So I was wondering what I should have done, or what you would have done
Me, I did nothing. Is this the kind of person I am? Am I the kind of person who turns the other way, looks but does not see?
Here’s the situation:
I had just gotten done with work. I’m tired, wet, I smell like too much chlorine and covered in scratches from little children’s fingernails. The sun is still peaking thru some early evening clouds, people across the street from my car are having a barbeque, I can smell the charcoal.
I turn my car on to the familiar rumble of the engine and drone of the radio, I weave in-between the sea of parked cars and pedestrians. I turn onto Montana, as always, there are no cars to wait for on the stop sign.
I’m following a scion, covered in ads. I think, I wonder if advertising on scions are the new thing for startup companies 1800SWAPNOW or was is swappers? Something swap. You don’t want your lease, and they do. No mention of what they want to do with your lease. I’m thinking, chop shop, or something similar.
They are going painfully slow, with their right hand turn signal on. my right hand turn signal is on. I just want to go home and shower, what are they going so slow for? Its green right?
Oh theres a pedestrian, a woman, taller, larger, white capris and a black top, maybe they are waiting for her to cross the street.
Wait, she’s not. She’s turning right as well, walking along Boudinot. This must suck, who walks on Boudinot, its all cars and the sidewalks are crap. The swapper scion is going slower, in the lane next to the sidewalk.
Im not waiting on these folks, they are going snail speed, there is no reason to be holding up traffic. I merge around them and drive on
I glance in my rearview mirror, something seemed wrong as I passed. The woman had turned, and looked at the scion. I see the door open as I look back. Maybe they are picking up their friend, or offering her a ride.
Wait, no she doesn’t want their ride, she slams the door shut and walks on. There are oncoming cars, I need to look ahead. I look back again a block further, I can’t see them, its too far and over a hill.
What is going on there? Where they harassing her? Where they thinking she was a prostitute? Was she? Does it matter? Should I have called the cops and told them I saw something questionable? What should I have told them? Is it fair to her that I was driving away from this “pimped out” SCION? Who tries to impress someone with a scion?
I drive on. I don’t notice where I’m going. And before I know it, I’m home, its 10 minutes later, and there is nothing I can do now to help, right?
Now I’m spending the next hour talking to myself seeing if I did the right thing. If I stopped and got out of my car, offered her a ride to saftey, making up fake fights where I don’t care I’m still wrapped in a towel, I am not armed, I have no fighting skills. I am a badass, defending my fellow woman. But this didn’t happen to me. I didn’t pull over, I didn’t call the cops, I defiantly didn’t pull moves Chow Yun Fat could be proud of.
What is humanity if you cant stand up for your fellow human being. But then, how do I know that that is what it was, couldn’t it have been a domestic dispute, a broken relationship, a friendship that went sour. All I know is that the driver, with the biggest assumption: was male, did not get along with the woman walker. Does that mean, it is my responsibility to fix this, to help them, if no help was asked . And most of all, does this mean that, in crisis, I cannot help those in need.
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1 comment:
I certainly wouldn't feel bad about what you did or didn't do, and you shouldn't generalize your reaction in this situation to apply to every other circumstance in which a quick, potentially disasterous decision must be made. I'm sure that in a more obvious act of antagonization, you would act appropriately and "stand up for your fellow human being." I believe that you can help those in need, but maybe when help is more obviously called for. Just think, though . . . if a woman is reported missing, and her description matches the woman you saw, you can help greatly by recounting what you saw of the incident, which you seem to remember vividly.
My personal reaction would have been to turn into a parking lot where I could still see, or where I could reverse to drive past the scene again. I think my judgement would also be based on the number of other people who could see what was happening, and since some daylight was still present, I imagine that the roads were far from empty. It's a hard circumstance for me to judge.
This strikes a personal chord with me, as there have been many times when I've heard a cat-call or wolf-whistle directed at me from cars driving too slowly on the street as I walk alone several city blocks to my car from work. I was also involved in a terrifying situation that left me too shaken to attempt finding justice, and I regret my silence exceedingly. When men leave you feeling terrified to walk alone through a parking lot at night, or to walk down city streets in broad daylight, there's a chance that even the smallest scene can trigger the need to act.
On a personal level, I feel the need to defend other women in ways that I was/am unable to defend myself. My regret has taught me the proper ways to act if such a situation were to arise again for myself, and I'll be damned if I witness anything similar happening to another and do nothing about it.
I think you did well enough to remember details, and I trust that when you do what you think is right, it is the right thing. And remember, nothing disables more than a swift kick, noses are easily broken, and elbows and knees only bend one way.
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